Wednesday, June 1, 2011

Urban Outfitters: No words.

M:  I. I just. I think I am offended by this:



A: I generally hesitate to curse on the blog, but what the fuck.

M: It's really bad, right? Like, OFFENSIVE?

But then:



A: OH MY GOD WHAT IS THAT WHY. SERIOUSLY KIDS I WAS THERE THE FIRST TIME IT WAS BAD I PROMISE.

M: One of these days a 19-year-old is going to flounce by me dressed like Annie Oakley crossed with Pippi Longstocking and I'm not going to have the inner grace to stop myself from tripping her.

A: Which reminds me of an outfit I wore for class photos in fifth grade:

(click for biggerness.)

I'm sure it won't be hard to figure out which one I am.

M: Oh my god oh my god oh my god. I love your little self and those glasses! Also, these glasses are "top rated" if you want to recreate the look:



A: That dress is why I hate ruffles so bad now. And glasses. And plaid. And everything else. God.

M: You are like Bershon Junior there.

A: That was a bad year for me, sartorially speaking. And in pretty much every other way.

M: Anyone that truly enjoyed 5th grade is a mystery to me.

A: Liars, is what those people are. Sorry, I didn't mean to make this all about me, more a cautionary tale about trying to replicate the 80s.

M: Well, I can't stop trolling the Urban Outfitters site and now I have convinced myself that I kind of love this tiny harmonica necklace?


I don't even like the harmonica!

A: $45? Dude.

M: Right? I think I have Stockholm Syndrome. Stop me before I end up in a romper.

A: Empty your shopping cart RIGHT NOW DO IT.

M: I am all shaky. I need you to show me something pretty, stat.

A: Ashley tried this on when she came to visit a few weeks ago:


Day Dresses by Alice + Olivia at ShopStyle

She looked like a million bucks in it and we cried and cried afterwards because they can't be together.

M: Oh, that is just fantastic. And now I'm back where I belong, coveting things I can't afford. Thank you, buddy.

A: Anytime, my friend.

6 comments:

  1. Adrien, you were the original hipster!

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  2. Hahaha! omg 5th grade was horrible! I had no style. none. We're talking sweatshirts with geese wearing bonnets.

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  3. I look like a cracked-out Laura Ingalls Wilder in that photo, so yeah.

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  4. I know a bartending 20-something who looks exactly like your 5th grade self. And, not surprisingly, she also wears headdresses (only to SXSW, of course).

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  5. Urban Outfitters has lost their damn mind. If they ever had one, which I'm really not sure of.

    Adrien! You look just like my best friend from sixth grade in that picture. I had Pat Benatar hair in 5th grade. It went superawesome with my parachute pants.

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